I've seen Paul McCartney in concert so my life is actually complete.
What did the cat say to the dog?
cats don’t talk
so apparently some guy goes around golf tournaments and shouts “mashed potatoes” after they tee off
I CANTG BR EATHE
boil ‘em mash ‘em stick ‘em in a stew
Driving to the movies with my fam and this fucking banana with a tin foil hat and wig is sitting under the freeway
An escaped sheep was found with 60 pounds of wool.
Shrek the sheep ran away and hid in a cave in New Zealand for 6 years. When Shrek was finally found in 2004, the sheep had gone unsheared for so long that it had accumulated 60 pounds of wool on its body, enough to make 20 suits! The sheep became famous and even got to meet the Prime Minister. Shrek finally passed away last month at the age of 16.
Its name was Shrek.
too many layers
That little tail wag kills me
Ugh, just take my man card already. TAKE IT.
I just passed 10,000 posts! Woop.